I have been back tracking 'CC' 's blog for a while these days as I have not much to do in the office; was very free! She has made me realise and grew to appreciate more of what I have in my life right now. Her words flows sadly beautifully with rich vocabs and it is as if I can feel how's she's feeling these days, alone , hurt, grieved with the very sudden demise of her bf one year back. It is so sad, beyond words to describe how she felt toward her greatest loss. She lives with a empty soul inside her zombified body, having to force smiles to the one who cared for her, crying herself to sleep every day hoping that he will be coming back, celebrating without the love one being with her for the rest of her life =(. They were a pictorial perfect couple that everyone will envy, that I will envy in the past. Now I know how fragile life is, a human being is; for one fateful day her other half was being taken away from her forever, without a proper parting, without her being prepared. Maybe we have all taken the everyday of our lives granted, feeling oh it's just another day of working/studying and nags about the lack of sleep and too much work to do. It's after the losing that we will come to realise why haven't we been cherishing everything that we have in our lives.
It's a knock on my head to wake up my ideas; of the way to treat the beloved ones around me. Especially Sumo dear, for I have not been treating him the way he deserves, so often he quotes. It's good that I have learnt before it is too late. He's been asking me for quite some times that 'what if he leave the world before me, or now, what will I do?' I stumbled on that question for I never did think about it at all, I don't want to think about it, or I feels that it won't be happening. What will I really do when it happens? I can only say for now I will treasure every minutes of my life with him, giving him what he truly deserves. I want to makes him feels proud of me for being the understanding, generous, caring gf. I don't want to have any regrets in my life later.
These days, I am much mallow in talking and constantly reminding myself to treat him well. I am more contented with the things I have, and very contented that I have him with me and around me whenever I needed him.
On Saturday evening, the wedding dinner of my cousin, my Aunt whispered to me asking me to keep my eyes and mind open about my lifetime partner. I said to her confidently that I have made the right choice and I will never regret. That's from the bottom of my heart for he's the world for me and nobody can make the same scarifies, love and cares he had for me. Somehow being with him made some of my dreams came true, the ones that I dare not take on if I was alone. The trust we have in each other meant the world to me and I know we'll be living happily in the long run of our relationship.
Not sure whether my entries makes sense at all, but to me, the bottom line is that I have really learnt the meaning of treasuring, thanks to her who have braved through the bitter-hell and sharing her experiences and feelings magnanimously. I will pray for her to get bravery, to storm through the all hardship and to become stronger to face life and live life the way her other half will wish she has. Aja Aja Fighting Miss Warrior. Thank you - eventhough you do not know me at all; for you have made me a better person at heart.
Optimised Cake.
4 comments:
always treasure our loved ones then will hv no regret... =)
Ya, i am sort of more optimistic and open minded =p you should read her blog if ya have time, maybe you will feel how i felt. =p But I already know you are very love, been love and has been loving the one most precious to you everyday, just a reminder at all times. Do you know who's blog I am referring to? text me if you wana know ba
r u talking about charlene chan's blog? oh man. i am super duper touched by her blog too. and i think i learn alot from her blog.
Ya, charlene chan. She's a warrior, may the best be with her right bestie
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